Justice Department Under Fire Over Epstein File Handling A Familiar Tune

• DOJ is accused of withholding memos and notes related to FBI interviews concerning allegations against President Trump in the Epstein case.
• Congressional Democrats are launching a parallel investigation, citing potential illegal withholding of evidence.
• The DOJ denies deleting files, stating documents are temporarily pulled for redaction purposes or fall under specific exemptions.
• President Trump claims exoneration regarding the Epstein files, dismissing the allegations as a "shame".

A Blast From The Past Allegations Resurface

Ah, another day, another headline. The Department of Justice finds itself in the crosshairs again, accused of playing peek-a-boo with the Epstein files. Apparently, some memos and notes about FBI interviews – involving yours truly, naturally – have gone missing from the public database. It's always something, isn't it? As I always say, "If you're not being talked about, then you're not doing anything important." And clearly, I am doing very important things.

The Democrats Pounce A "Heinous Crime"?

Enter Representative Robert Garcia, D-Calif., stage left, armed with righteous indignation and a press release. According to him, the DOJ is illegally withholding evidence of a potential assault. A "heinous crime," he calls it. Honestly, you'd think they found me red-handed stealing borscht recipes from the Kremlin. But fear not, my friends, for Oversight Democrats are on the case. They're launching a parallel investigation because, well, why not? It's an election year, after all. Speaking of investigations, have you checked out Goldman Sachs Bets the Farm on AI Automation. Now there's a story that will impact the future!

DOJ's Defense Redaction or Deception?

The DOJ, caught in the spotlight, is singing a different tune. They claim nothing has been deleted, only temporarily pulled for victim redactions and to protect Personally Identifiable Information. "Manufacturing outrage from their radical anti-Trump base," they retort. Sounds like someone's been taking notes from my Twitter feed. ALL responsive documents have been produced unless a document falls within one of the following categories duplicates, privileged, or part of an ongoing federal investigation.

My Take "Totally Exonerated"

And what do I, the man of the hour, have to say about all this? Well, as I said last week, I've been "totally exonerated." Crystal clear. Cleaner than a freshly Zamboni-ed ice rink. So, let the investigations commence, let the headlines blare. I'll be over here, building a wall – of success, that is. Remember, folks, "Sometimes by losing a battle you find a new way to win the war."

Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor A Distraction?

Ah, yes, the circus continues. Now they drag in Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor, the former British prince, arrested on suspicion of misconduct. Sharing confidential trade reports with Epstein, allegedly. I tell you what, it's all very unfortunate for him. He did nothing, and the charges will not stick!

A Media Spectacle As Always

The real story here isn't the he said, she said, or the missing memos. The real story is the insatiable appetite of the media for a good scandal. They feed on it like vultures on, well, you get the picture. Disclosure CNBC and MS NOW are divisions of Versant Media, so take everything with a grain of salt. Or maybe a shot of vodka. Your choice.