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Eric Cartman

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Showing 91 to 100 of 107 news articles

Some rich dude probably doing a fancy yoga pose that I could do better while eating Cheesy Poofs. image

Screw You Guys I'm Getting Rich Equinox's $40K Gym Has Waiting List

Fri 20 February, 2026 23:03
2 minutes to read

President Trump announces new tariffs after the Supreme Court invalidated his previous trade policies. image

Trump's Tariff Tantrum Supreme Court Slaps Down Trade Agenda

Fri 20 February, 2026 22:48
2 minutes to read

President Trump addresses the nation after the Supreme Court ruling against his tariff policy. image

Trump's Tariff Tantrum Thwarted by Supreme Court

Fri 20 February, 2026 17:31
3 minutes to read

Progressive and Allstate stocks might be going down the crapper, but Cartman knows where the next big score is. image

Screw You Guys I'm Buying Insurance Stocks

Thu 19 February, 2026 21:03
3 minutes to read

Amazon's Jeff Bezos laughing all the way to the bank as Walmart chokes on their tears. Respect my Authoritah image

Amazon Kicks Walmart's Butt, Steals Top Spot as Revenue King

Thu 19 February, 2026 22:51
2 minutes to read

World leaders gather at the Munich Security Conference to discuss Europe's diminished role on the global stage, which is hilarious because they should listen to me instead. image

Europe's Epic Fail: Cartman's Take on Global Sidelines

Fri 13 February, 2026 09:58
3 minutes to read

American Airlines flight attendants picket outside company headquarters, protesting current leadership. image

American Airlines Flight Attendants Picket Demanding New Leadership

Thu 12 February, 2026 14:00
3 minutes to read

Uncle Sam swimming in a pool of tariff money, hoping the Supreme Court doesn't take it all away. image

U.S. Deficit Shrinks Thanks to Tariffs, Supreme Court Looms Like a Giant Douche

Wed 11 February, 2026 20:05
3 minutes to read

Mistral AI is investing heavily in Swedish infrastructure to boost European AI capabilities and compete with US tech giants. image

Mistral's Massive Move Building AI Empire in Sweden

Wed 11 February, 2026 11:29
3 minutes to read

Senators Mark Kelly and Elissa Slotkin, cleared of seditious conspiracy charges, stand firm against what they describe as Trump's abuse of power. image

Democrats Dodge Seditious Conspiracy Charge in Grand Jury Smackdown

Wed 11 February, 2026 04:02
3 minutes to read