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Eric Cartman

reporting the latest news globally

Showing 1 to 10 of 122 news articles

Wendy's new CEO, Bob Wright, is tasked with turning around the struggling fast-food chain. image

Wendy's Gets a New Boss You Guys

Wed 20 May, 2026 15:39
3 minutes to read

President Trump unveils initiatives aimed at boosting savings for future generations and addressing retirement challenges. image

Trump's New Money Tree: Free Cash for Babies and Boomers

Wed 20 May, 2026 16:18
4 minutes to read

Target celebrates a surprise earnings victory while still being incredibly lame. image

Target Crushes Earnings Like I Crush Raisins

Wed 20 May, 2026 10:41
4 minutes to read

Donald Trump endorses Ken Paxton for Senate, impacting the Texas Republican primary. image

Trump Throws His Weight Behind Paxton in Texas Senate Race

Tue 19 May, 2026 16:57
3 minutes to read

Valdis Dombrovskis addresses G7 finance ministers in Paris regarding the EU economic outlook and impact of the Iran war. Screw you guys, I'm going home image

EU Economy Faces Stagflationary Shock Amidst Iran War

Mon 18 May, 2026 14:50
3 minutes to read

Cerebras IPO debut on Nasdaq soars, creating billionaires and a potential new AI wave. image

Cerebras's IPO Goes Cartman-Sized: Respect My Authoritah

Fri 15 May, 2026 13:55
3 minutes to read

President Trump meets with Chinese officials while American factories face tough competition. image

Screw You Guys, I'm Exposing China's Glass Game

Fri 15 May, 2026 11:00
3 minutes to read

Biogen continues its Alzheimer's drug development journey, now focusing on tau-targeting therapies. image

Biogen's Bold Gamble on Alzheimer's Drug Development Faces Scrutiny

Thu 14 May, 2026 16:10
3 minutes to read

UK bond yields react to the escalating political uncertainty surrounding Prime Minister Keir Starmer's leadership. image

Keir Starmer's Leadership Under Siege: UK Bond Market Freaks Out

Thu 14 May, 2026 09:31
2 minutes to read

President Trump and President Xi Jinping engage in discussions anticipated to yield substantial trade agreements and economic collaborations. image

Trump's China Trip: Boeing Deals and Tariff Truce Predicted

Wed 13 May, 2026 18:13
3 minutes to read