Super Bowl Viewership Nearly Breaks Records Thanks to Bad Bunny

• Seahawks victory over Patriots drew nearly 125 million viewers.
• Bad Bunny's halftime show averaged 128.2 million viewers.
• Super Bowl audience peaked at 137.8 million during the second quarter.
• Advertisers paid up to $10 million for 30-second ad slots.

Another Super Bowl, Another Massive Audience

Alright, meatbags, it's your favorite cyclops, Turanga Leela, reporting from the year 3024, or whenever the heck you're reading this. Turns out, you primitive humans still care about sports. This Super Bowl thing? Apparently, almost 125 million of you glued your eyeballs to the screen to watch the Seattle Seahawks clobber the New England Patriots. That's a lot of eyes, even by Earth standards. Makes me almost wish I had two.

Bad Bunny's Halftime Show Steals the Spotlight

But here's the real kicker. More people watched the halftime show than the actual game. Some dude named Bad Bunny, and no, I didn't name him, hopped around while people stared intently. It even outdid the game itself. Speaks volumes, doesn't it? Thinking about it, maybe there is something about those halftime shows after all. This reminds me, have you read Spotify Hits Play on Profits Stock Surges? It kind of highlights how music can grab more attention than even established events.

Advertising Costs That Are Out of This World

And get this, companies paid $10 million for just *30 seconds* of airtime during the game. Ten million. Scammers, the whole lot of them. Honestly, for that kind of money, I could buy a lifetime supply of Bachelor Chow, and still have enough left over to bribe Zapp Brannigan into retirement. Almost. "If we hit that bullseye, the rest of the dominoes will fall like a house of cards. Checkmate."

Political Football: Controversy Kicks Off

Of course, no big event is complete without some bonehead political nonsense. Apparently, this Bad Bunny cat sang in Spanish and ticked off some people with his views on immigration. Look, I'm just a delivery girl from the 31st century, but even I know that whining about music is about as productive as Fry's attempts at being a hero. "I am the man with no name, Zapp Brannigan!" he exclaims, moments before tripping over his own cape. Sound familiar?

Turning Point USA's Alternative Halftime Show

And because one controversial performance wasn't enough, some group called Turning Point USA threw their own "All-American Halftime Show" featuring Kid Rock. I'm assuming that involved a lot of beer, questionable fashion choices, and maybe some eagles screeching in the background. Sounds about right. "Sweet zombie Jesus" - that is all I have to say about that, Bender might have a point there though.

The Bottom Line: People Love Spectacle

In the end, it seems you Earthlings are suckers for a good show, be it football, music, or overpriced commercials. As for me, I'll stick to delivering packages and trying to keep Fry out of trouble. At least that's mildly entertaining. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a package to deliver to Omicron Persei 8. Wish me luck, it's bound to be a "death sentence!"